Child of Mercy Read online

  “So, tell me, angel…” Parker’s voice sounded low and intimate at my ear. “Do you want me to touch you?”

  All manner of images flashed through my dirty mind that had nothing to do with the childbirth experience. Did I want him to touch me… right at that moment I didn’t want him to stop. “I… um…”

  “Tell me what you want.” His lips dragged across my cheek and I felt myself turning instinctively towards them. “Guide me to what you need.”

  I hardly knew…

  “Very good, kids! Alright, we’ll open the floor up to some questions and answers now.” Just like that, massage time passed and I was spared having to answer. I leaned back against Parker’s solid chest, feeling very comfortable with the way his arms draped around my shoulders.

  Most of the questions were ones I knew the answers to from hours spent poring over books about what to expect during the delivery process, but some of them were interesting.

  Parker surprised me by raising his hand. “Kitty, I’ve read that sometimes the drugs used to take the edge off the contractions can make the mother nauseous. Is there anything we can do to counter that?”

  “A very good question!” Kitty beamed, but I missed her answer, too busy trying to get a look at Parker. Where had that question come from? Was he kidding or had he really spent some time reading up on the stuff? From what I could see, he seemed pretty interested in her reply, and I had to shake my head on the inside over the change in Parker since I’d first met him.

  Not that he’d ever been a man-slut or anything, but he had a reputation as a player. The idea of him researching and participating in anything like childbirth was… I wouldn’t have believed it if anyone had told me I’d be sitting there with him even a year before.

  Parker noticed me looking at him and dropped a quick wink before turning his attention back to Kitty.

  “Alright, now we’ll all take a stroll down to hospital admitting and fill out the pre-registration cards.” Kitty motioned us to our feet. “That way, when the big day arrives you’ll be all set to go.”

  “Stay put,” Parker instructed, climbing to his feet and offering me his hands to help me up. “Damn, it’s like pulling in a marlin.”

  “I’m so glad I invited you.” I smiled sweetly, not offering any objections when he put the mat away and picked up our pillows without having to be asked. En masse, we left the community center for the short trek to the neighboring hospital. With so many couples, it took a while to get everything squared away, but eventually we strolled back outside into the mild evening air.

  “You’ll call me when the time comes, right?” he asked, tucking the pillows into the back seat of his Camaro.

  “You want to be there when the baby’s born?”

  “I’d like to think I didn’t just sit through an hour of heavy breathing for nothing. Of course I want to be there.”

  “Oh sure, the first time you see me naked and I’m pushing out a watermelon? I don’t think so.” I brushed past him to the passenger’s side door, but he loped around the car, beating me to it.

  “Fine, there’s an easy way to fix that.”

  “What?” I guessed if he stayed up by my head, he wouldn’t need to see all my unmentionables. Or maybe I could ask to be draped for privacy?

  Parker had other ideas, though. “Let me see you naked now.”

  “What? I’m not doing that.”

  “Why not? It’ll cut that particular tension and then on the big day we can get down to business. That way we’re both satisfied.”

  “I’m not gonna strip down to satisfy your curiosity.” I tried to reach past him to open the car door, but he blocked my access.

  “I wasn’t talking about that kind of satisfaction, darlin’.” He waggled his brows playfully.

  “God, I never know when to take you seriously…” I scowled and he dropped the smarmy bit, his face earnest.

  “Okay really… I’m being serious. Will you call me when it’s time?”

  Did I want him there for such an incredibly intimate event? “I don’t know, Parker, are you sure you want to be there for that? You saw the video, it doesn’t look at all pleasant.”

  “That’s why I want to be there for you.” He brushed the hair back behind my ear. “To help you through it. And Daphne too, I’m pretty sure she’ll want to be there, right?”

  “That’s true,” I allowed. Somehow the idea of Daphne being there too made it feel less intimate, more like support and less like… I don’t know what. The lines defining our friendship had grown all indistinct and blurry and I wasn’t sure how I felt about that yet. “Yeah, okay, I’ll call you when the time comes.”

  “That’s my girl,” he grinned, pulling the door open for me and I couldn’t help but think… whose girl was I, really?

  * * *

  After Parker dropped me off, I trudged up the stairs to my apartment, a little preoccupied as I thought about the direction my life was headed in. Nearly six months pregnant and no sign of the father in sight. I’d be hard pressed to keep from dipping into Adam’s funds after the baby came along, no matter how good my intentions were.

  Despite the assurances I’d given my mother to keep her from moving in with me, I wasn’t all that confident in my parenting skills. Sure, I’d practically raised Matty from preschool on, but I had little to no experience with babies, and the idea of doing it alone felt incredibly daunting. Daphne and Parker could give me a hug and assure me I wouldn’t be alone all they wanted, but it wouldn’t change the fact that day in and day out I’d be a single parent.

  No more crawling under the covers with a good book when I felt craptastic, I’d have to force myself to get up and take care of the baby whether I wanted to or not. No more cruising to Lolly’s with the guys after work, I’d have to get home and relieve whatever sitter I’d tricked into watching Bunny for the night. No more impromptu shopping trips, no more midnight margaritas, no more dance parties. No more parties, period.

  But I’d have someone to care for, someone to talk to, someone to love who would grow to love me back. Someone to share the simple joys of life with and teach about the wonders of chocolate explosion ice cream.

  And I’d have a part of Adam with me he could never take away.

  As I laid my hand on the doorknob, I heard low voices coming from inside my apartment, and my angelic spidey senses started to twitch nervously. Who was in there?

  Making myself imperceptible, I opened the door as quietly as I could manage, the voices louder once I stepped inside. As soon as I saw the who it was, I forgot to be stealthy, my temper getting the better of me as I saw Bert & Hubie, Raum’s minions, kicking back on my sofa, up to their elbows in snacks.

  “What the hell is this?” I demanded, and Nelo dropped a plate of cookies on the floor on the way from the kitchen.

  “Beggin’ yer pardon, miss.” Bert snapped to attention, and Hubie followed quick suit, taking his dirty boots off my coffee table without having to be asked.

  “We was reportin’ for duty,” Hubie nodded earnestly, whipping a worn cap from his head and fidgeting with it.

  “What duty? And who said to feed them?” I directed at Nelo, who looked up at me guiltily from picking up the broken pieces of plate.

  “Was it wrong to feed them? They’re our guests.”

  “Trust me, they are not our guests, Nelo.” I tried to sound less stern before he shook himself into a nervous fit. “I hope your servitude to Raum was worth giving up your lives, boys, because I warned him to leave me and mine alone.” Summoning my sword, I faced them down.

  “N-No… you’ve got the w-wrong idea, miss,” Bert stammered. “Tell her, Hubie.” His jaundiced eyes bulged terribly.

  “Indeed, we ain’t here after you, Mistress, we’s here for you.”

  “For me,” I repeated, staring at them blankly.

  “We’s here as tribute,” Hubie nodded so fast I thought his head might wobble off.

  “To keep you safe,” Bert added with a bright smi
le. Well, as bright as a mouth full of rotten teeth could be.

  “To keep me safe?” I felt like a parrot, but found myself absolutely dumbfounded by the proclamation. The pair of them nodded and smiled, and I almost wished they’d go back to their normal sullen demeanor.

  “See, they’re friends.” Nelo smiled wide, blinking up at me with innocence, and I patted his head, letting the sword disappear.

  “I don’t know about that, but you and I are going to have a talk later about the definition of guests.” Turning to face the pair of demons, I tried to ignore the litter of food liberally dusting my living room. “You two are here as bodyguards then?” Why did the idea make me cringe?

  “Right-o. Where you go, we go, don’t we Hubie?” They both visibly eased after I put the sword away.

  “I don’t need a bodyguard, so you can go back home.”

  Hubie took a step closer, twisting the cap in his hands. “Oh no, we can’t go back, miss, leastwise not now. Raum’ll have our heads.”

  “Fine, then you don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here,” I waved them off. “Go play somewhere else.” Preferably in traffic.

  “If Raum finds out we wasn’t living up to our end of the bargain, he’d be ever so angry,” Bert said in a mournful voice.

  “Tell me again why I’m supposed to care?”

  Nelo tugged at my sleeve. “Raum is must unpleasant when he’s angry,” he said softly, and I felt bad for the position Raum had put them in, but it really wasn’t my problem.

  “Well, you can’t stay here. I told you, I don’t need a bodyguard.”

  “We wasn’t thinkin’ of puttin’ you out, Mistress,” Hubie piped up in an ingratiating tone. At least I think it was supposed to be ingratiating, but it came out more annoying. “We’ll find somewheres to hole up. We just wanted to present ourselves all friendly-like so’s you wouldn’t be afeared when we accompany you places.”

  “Boys, let me make something crystal clear.” I clapped my hands on their shoulders, trying to ignore the cloud of stench that motion raised. “I don’t want a demon entourage. So, if you’re thinking about following me around day and night, you can forget it. If you think Raum’s temper is bad, trust me, you haven’t seen mine.”

  “It is a fearsome thing indeed,” Nelo nodded solemnly.

  The pair flinched under my hands almost as if I’d struck them, and I let go with a sigh, disgusted with myself for feeling pity for them. They were the same two demons that dragged me off to Midian in the first place! I shouldn’t feel anything but contempt, but instead I couldn’t help the niggling little idea I was somehow responsible for them since Raum gifted me with them.

  “What if I gave you another assignment?”

  “What kind of assignment?” Bert asked, a light of hope behind his yellowed eyes.

  “What if you protect Oriana instead? She could use looking after more than I can, and she might actually appreciate a familiar face hanging around.” Not that I thought they’d keep her out of trouble when it came to fitting in, but they could probably be counted on to keep her from burning to death in a microwave related fire.

  “What do you reckon, Hubie? Could we do such a thing?” Bert blinked, and Hubie scratched at his lanky hair absently.

  “We was to follow her orders, keep her and hers safe. Might could make it work.”

  “Great, it’s a done deal as soon as I talk to Oriana. If she objects, you guys are on your own.”

  “She won’t mind, she’s always been right friendly to us,” Bert beamed.

  “Right, well, we’ll see if she’s interested. In the meantime, you guys have to clear out of here. It’s late and you two are very… pungent.”

  “I had a bath not three months ago,” Hubie smoothed his hands over his grubby coat as Bert sniffed delicately at his shoulder, shrugging them when he detected nothing amiss.

  “Nelo, do you think you could help them find a place to stay for the night?”

  “No worries, miss,” Hubie interrupted. “We’ve spent plenty of time around these parts, won’t be no trouble findin’ suitable digs.”

  “How comforting,” I gave him a thin smile. “Alright then boys, why don’t you head off, and I’ll be in touch.” Only without actually touching. I already felt like I needed a shower just from sharing the same air with them.

  “Right-o,” Hubie pushed Bert towards the door. “Never you fear, Mistress. We’ll be nearby in case you needs us.”

  “Thank you, Mistress,” Bert echoed. “It was ever so nice to see you again.” He offered a last rotted smile before they were out the door.

  “I can clean up the mess if you wish to rest now, Mistress,” Nelo said in a small voice. “You must be fatigued from learning to birth.”

  “Learning to… no, I wasn’t practicing the actual labor, Nelo,” I shook my head. “The class was about what to expect when it happens. Besides, I don’t think I could relax right now, I feel like I need to scrub down everything,” I shuddered, surveying the mess. At least I had a vinyl couch that could be easily wiped down instead of having to rent an upholstery cleaner.

  “Leave that to me, it was my mistake in welcoming them into your home.” Nelo began to busily gather up the remains of the food, catching on to the fact that I wanted to toss all the leftovers rather than share what they’d already touched.

  “It’s alright, Nelo, I’m not blaming you. But we should talk about this,” I replied, grabbing a big, black garbage bag to help out. “In the future, don’t let anyone in unless you know I’ve invited them, or they’re close friends.”

  “As you wish, Mistress.”

  “If you’re unsure, then keep them out. Or you can try calling me if it’s an emergency.”

  “I have no means to call you.”

  I had no landline, just my cell phone which was usually with me. For a split second I toyed with the idea of getting him his own phone, but decided that was a luxury I couldn’t afford. “You just have to call my full name and I’ll hear you,” I replied. “But only save that for real emergencies. Running out of bacon doesn’t count.”

  “What if I need bacon?” he asked, looking worried about the idea of being without its salty goodness since I’d brought it up.

  “No one needs bacon all that badly. Something like that can wait.”

  “Not even if I need it for a recipe?”

  “Not even then,” I replied gravely. “Nelo, are you lonely here?” I asked, wondering if that had something to do why he’d invited frick and frack in for a party.

  “Lonely?” he blinked. “Of course not. I have Mimsy to talk to always, and your company to look forward to.”

  “I meant for your own kind. Do you ever miss being in Midian?”

  “Miss it?” Nelo made a strange keening sound, doubling over as if he was in pain and I dropped to my knees to see what was the matter. He rolled onto his back, feet waving in the air and that’s when I realized he was laughing. Uncontrollable giggles to be more exact, and it took him a few minutes to catch his breath enough to speak.

  “No, Mistress. I do not miss Midian. I love it here with you. Why… do you wish me to return to Midian when the Bunny comes?” His eyes widened in sudden fear.

  “No, Nelo.” I gathered him onto my shrinking lap as best I could. “I don’t want you to go back to Midian. Ohana means family, and we don’t leave family behind.” I put it in terms he could understand. “We’re adding a new member to the family, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t room for you too. There’s always room for family.”

  “Then why did you tell your mother there wasn’t room for her to live with us?”

  Damn, he had me there. “I didn’t mean there isn’t room for her in my life, I meant there isn’t room for her physically here. She comes with way too much baggage. Besides, you can’t have too many mama bears in the house, the baby bear won’t know who to listen to.”

  “I thought you said it was a bunny…”

  “It’s not…” Lord, did he really
think I had a fuzzy rabbit growing inside of me? “There’s no bunny or bear inside here, it’s a normal human baby.” I hoped… “Bunny is a nick name until I find out if it’s a girl or a boy and pick out a real name.”

  “Oh.” Nelo nodded in understanding. “I like Bunny, it sounds playful. Will the Bunny like to play?”

  “Not right at first, it’ll be too small for games to start with. Human babies are very delicate, we have to be careful not to break them. But when it gets bigger, then yes, I think it’ll like games.”

  “I’ll be very careful not to break it.”

  “I know you will, Nelo. But right at first, how about we come up with the rule that you only touch the baby when I’m around. Just until you get the hang of being around it.”

  “As you wish, Mistress.” I held him in silence then, rocking us both gently. “Mistress?” he asked after a while.

  “Hmm?”

  “Can the baby hear me?”

  “I think so. Studies have shown babies react to sounds outside the womb.”

  “Good.” He leaned down to speak against my swelling abdomen. “I can’t wait to play with you, Bunny.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  “I feel like I’m always thanking you for something lately,” I remarked, stretching the seatbelt as wide as it could go to accommodate my giant belly.

  “That’s not such a bad thing, is it?” Parker looked over the tops of his sunglasses at me. Once more he came to the rescue, offering to take me to my doctor’s appointment after my trusty car developed a terminal case of not-working-itis. I could have flown, but I felt like a giant hippo lately, my swelling abdomen throwing me off balance. A car ride seemed safer.

  “No, I just hate asking for favors. I should probably get used to it though unless I can scrounge up enough money for a new car.”

  “Why don’t you use Adam’s car? He left you a sweet ride, didn’t he?”

  “I’d rather not owe him any favors,” I muttered, looking out the window.

  “Good.” I heard him say under his breath.

  Things were still in limbo between Parker and me in the weeks that passed since the kiss. We hadn’t talked about it at all, but I noticed that Parker started to take more liberties with me than before. He’d come and rub my shoulders at work when I was on a break or take my hand more often if we went somewhere together. Goodbyes were generally accompanied by a quick peck on the lips. Once or twice not all that quick…